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  O'Malley Asks for Forgiveness at St. Patrick's

By Nadine Wandzilak
Stoneham Sun
May 31, 2006

http://www2.townonline.com/stoneham/localRegional/view.bg?articleid=505400

Inside St. Patrick's Church last Friday evening, Cardinal Sean O'Malley, Archbishop of Boston, led prayers that asked for forgiveness for bishops' and priests' sins - including the failure to act - in connection with sexual abuse by priests in the Catholic Church.

"Forgive us for the sins against your children," attendees prayed in a litany of repentance, for the "loss of innocence, "the "hurts and pains born by parents and families" and "for wounds that may never heal," as the cardinal and about a dozen other priests and deacons lay prone, face down, from forehead to feet, on the floor in front of the altar.

The prayer service, part of a "Pilgrimage of repentance and hope: a novena to the Holy Spirit" in nine communities that experienced "an especially painful history of sexual abuse of children by priests," according to the archdiocese, is like Yom Kippur, a time of atonement, for the sin of clergy sexual abuse, O'Malley said during his 15-minute homily. "We need the gift of wisdom," he said, "to know how to avoid evil." Prayer and repentance are a prelude, he said, to acquiring wisdom.

A parishioner, the sister of a man abused by a priest, spoke about impact of sexual abuse by a priest on her brother and her family.

The service drew about 150 people inside.

Outside the church, a group called for more than prayers. An apology "has to include details, such as the name of perpetrators," especially for "still-silent victims," Anne Doyle said she told the cardinal after the service. The model for that kind of apology, according to Doyle, is the Truth and Reconciliation Commission in South Africa. "It is essential," she said, "that perpetrators and those who covered up for them give details of their crime."

Doyle said the group numbered about 30 and was formed shortly before the cardinal's novena. Its members includes "all Catholics or survivors" of clergy sexual abuse.

The church and prayer became a "link to betrayal" for "our abused sisters and brothers," according a flyer handed out by members of the unnamed group, before and after the service, "through the actions of priests and bishops."

During the service, a parishioner spoke at the request of Rev. Bill Schmidt about what she and her family "carried for so long in anguish and shame." St. Patrick's changed from a "tight knit parish" when "the evil priest," who she did not name, came approximately 35 years ago and molested her brother.

"We don't know the pain and suffering of my brother," she said.

The parishioner's mother confronted the priest and approached a local police officer. In both cases, "She was dismissed," the woman said.

"We went our merry ways" for about 30 years, the woman said. Then she read newspaper story about clergy sexual abuse. "We (had) thought it was just in our town," she said. "We had no idea how widespread it was." Now "Our story can be told by other families." She said she has been "overwhelmed" by the number of families "impacted by this evil."

It's critical that the church admits its actions, hears what victims experienced and says "I'm sorry," according to Dick and Pat McConville, from St. Mary's parish in Melrose - "and asks for forgiveness," Pat added.

Without forgiveness, there can be no healing, Cynthia Mead of Melrose said on her way in to the prayer service. "It's so important," Mead said, "that the cardinal is publicly repenting before God and the Church. I want to be part of it."

Cardinal O'Malley must take two actions "to ensure the safety of our children and vulnerable adults," according to the flyer handed out. O'Malley should "publicly support legislation to repeal statutes of limitations for sexual abuse and publish a list of the names of all priests to whom a settlement has been paid or who been subject of a "credible accusation" of sexual abuse.

"Only when these two actions are taken will we see the archdiocese's first, sincere steps in creating a safer church and society," the flyer states. Doyle said the group has received no response from O'Malley.

Another flyer listed seven priests in "a partial list of accused priests who have worked at St. Patrick's parish, dating back to 1953. The list includes Paul Shanley, from 1960 to 1967.

Shanley, a defrocked Roman Catholic priest, is now servicing a jail sentence after being convicted of indecent assault and battery and rape of a child while he was at a Newton parish in the 1980's. He served at St Patrick's parish during his first assignment, Rev. Bill Schmidt of St. Patrick's said last week.

Healing

The prayer service "is a good idea," according to Rosemary Moran. "The Archdiocese (of Boston) does have to heal itself. You don't heal unless you put salve on a wound. You have to do it from within." And "It's up to us," she said, "to support the cardinal." Moran has a son who is a priest. "He said, 'All of us answer to God about what we do and don't do,'" Moran said.

But "You can't pray rape away," according to one of the signs held at a driveway exit from a parish parking lot. The same people are still in charge in the church, said sign holder Paul Kellen. Another sign described the novena as a public relations ploy.

The group distributed a flyer that urged people who were abused by a priest or church employee to "come forward and get help."

"You are not alone" and "not responsible for the abuse," the flyer read.

Young people were letting their elders know that "there was a crisis, that something was wrong," according to the sister of the abuse victim who spoke at the service. The response, she said: "Look the other way. Pretend you didn't hear it. Pretend you didn't see it."

Since then, the woman said she has learned about "delayed grief." She has realized that "It's OK to grieve openly. We are in this together," she said. "We need to talk about it."

But not to lose faith, she added. When the clergy sexual abuse began, "We were people of blind faith," the woman said. Her mother's faith never wavered, she said. "This crisis should not make our faith any less."

 
 

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